Life, reset.

As mentioned on my last blog post, I’ve just completed 5 years at Canonical, and this is an year of many more milestones.

My time at Canonical could only be described as excellent, and with the kids just past 3 years old, personal life has been getting back on track again. We moved to a larger apartment mid-2012. Kids started going to day care in early 2013, which gave me some calm afternoons to focus on work. We finished paying our car. Things suddenly got… too comfortable.

The loss of Dorneles, just short of three years ago, affected me in ways that were not fully apparent. I became more introspective and spent way too much time thinking about how short our life truly is, and how our plans, if not executed, end up being just that… plans. Not too long before his accident, Dorneles was talking about moving to Norway with his family, a plan that never had the chance to be executed.

For many years I, too, planned to move abroad, but never had the courage to do so. And then other things go in the way. Finishing university, having kids, Daiane being too attached to her parents, and so on.

Suddenly, an opportunity popped up. A chance to reset everything. Start a new life, in a new country, with a new job. It seemed too good to be true. And indeed, we spent countless nights debating the pros and cons to no avail. Nothing could tip the scale in either direction.

Truth is, more than not having a good reason to take the opportunity, we lacked a really good reason not to take the opportunity, other than fear. Mighty, paralyzing fear. We went over the pros once more: kids are the right age, our parents are still young and can care for themselves for a few years, if everything goes wrong we still have a home we can come back to, and so on. And then we thought of Dorneles again, and that tipped the scale big time.

Since last Tuesday, we’re now living in Zürich. As of next Monday, I’ll be one more piece in the well oiled Chocolate Factory.

As someone that’s quite adverse to change, a small town boy that always lived in the same city, I still get shivers down my spine every time I think about the effects of this decision on my own life, and the life of my kids and relatives. There’s really no way to know if it was the right decision or not, but my wife keeps telling me that it is much better to try and fail, than not try and regret.

So there it is: life, reset. A clean slate. Let’s make this a beautiful and memorable journey.

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